N ~ Not Your Business #atozchallenge

All Aboard! "It's Very Swedish..." a train on a cultural journey through Sweden, exploring the differences big and small between American and Swedish culture.

***

If you were a true Swede, you wouldn't have a blog like mine.  I'm not "Very Swedish..." when it comes to my online life.  I don't have an online persona.  Tina is my real name.  Doesn't take much to figure out my last name.  I've told you where I live.  I've shown you pictures of my family.  I've shared embarrassing stories, my faith, my struggles, my successes, MY LIFE.

I called The Swede and asked him to speak openly about the famous Swedish reserved personality.  (We both got a chuckle out of that oxymoron.)  Remember that we're talking generalities here, because I am not your average American, I am much more outgoing and let-it-all-hang-out than most people.  There's also that spectrum of course when it comes to Swedes.

In general though, they tend to be more reserved, and keep their thoughts, problems, etc. private, maybe sharing with a best friend, but certainly not "with the world at large" or a casual friend.

This trait isn't just Swedish, it's more a northern European quality, as The Nutritionist likes to say.  It's not that they're unfriendly - a clerk in a store is just as likely to engage you in a casual conversation as is an American clerk.

If you want a good example of reserved, there's this really wonderful, quirky movie called Kitchen Stories about Norwegian bachelor farmers being observed by researchers as to their cooking habits. The main character just stops using his kitchen, and cooks in a closet over the kitchen, cutting a hole in the floor to observe the lonely observer, who is sitting in the kitchen wondering what the farmer is eating, and where...I'd call that being private.

Since this is all about privacy, and being reserved, that's all you get today.  OK, truthfully, it's not about me all of a sudden changing my personality.  I'm just out of time!

Would you say you lean more toward the quiet, keep to yourself side, or are you more let it all hang out?  Is that a cultural trait would you say, or just YOUR personality?  It's just so fun to have such an international group of readers to learn from.  I'm SO enjoying your comments.

~Tina, who will continue to just blab away about anything and everything, again tomorrow ;-)

©2014 All Rights Reserved

Introducing New Tab: Nickname Translator

I added a tab up there. It's my nickname translator. Do me a favor and make sure the tab works, and then please leave me a comment about whether my descriptions should be shorter, longer, etc. In other words, EVALUATE. You can leave the comment here, or on that page. I plan to keep adding to it like I do my “about me” tab, but if I'm already doing it wrong, I want to know. Seriously. Hit me. Thanks.

SkinnyBoy: You Is Kind, You is smart. You is important.

Feeling blue. SkinnyBoy has moved to Florida. As in our chances of crossing paths again are as slim as he is.

He used to be our neighbor, lived four houses away. He spent as much time at our house as he was allowed, which was pretty much 24/7 in the summers, and during the school year, he'd show up for our carpool almost an hour early to “hang out, I was ready for school.” I fed him breakfast. Made sure he had lunch money or packed him a lunch. His Dad had lost his job even before the Great Recession hit. I know things were tough at his house for a multitude of reasons, so we did what we could to help, though direct help was completely refused. Out of respect for him, let's just leave all that there.

After I dropped him at his house on school days, with his over-stuffed back-pack and french horn, he'd shut the door with a, “See you in a minute!” and would be back at our house almost before I could turn the car around and hit our driveway. He stayed for dinner a lot. Eventually of course he had to go home to do his homework, but so did my boys. Worked out great. Just for reference, my boys are 2 ½ years apart, he's right between them age-wise. He and I share a birthday. With Obama. And Best :-)

I love this boy. A boy of integrity, great work ethic, always cleaned up his dishes and offered to do chores. We pay for chores around here, don't believe in “allowance”. There are of course some “because you live here” chores which don't pay (dishes, laundry, trash, recycling, vacuuming, sweeping) but others do. He did a lot of those. Loving video games as much as my boys, he did those to make any spending “frivolously” possible, I'm sure.

Two years ago they lost their house and moved across town to a rental duplex. That didn't stop our boys who have bikes, he'd just ride over here and knock, just as if he'd run down the hill. Friendship continued almost interrupted.

A month ago he began preparing us all. “My Dad is maybe getting a job in Florida.” Wow. Job great. Florida not so much. Dad got job. He came over to say goodbye while I was in Texas. I didn't get to give that skinny little body one more hug. I didn't get to tell him, one more time, my version of this quote from The Help as Aibileen did Mae Mobley, “You is kind, you is smart. You is important.”

I asked him once why he liked being over here so much. “You're always happy to see me, I know you love me, and it feels really nice to be here.” Hold on to that thought dear boy as your life is about to change. May you find another family that makes you feel that way. Good bye, SkinnyBoy. Good bye.