I
don't know if it's happening in other parts of the country, but in
our neighborhood, it's Squirrelmageddon. I am NOT making this up and
I'm not the only one who noticed.
At
first I thought I was over-reacting and making it up and the
only one who noticed. Driving out of my neighborhood, I drive on my
street and one more, and then I'm on fairly main streets. On each
street, a squirrel will dart out. And keep running. Right in front
of my car, almost daring me to hit it.
Now,
I'm not an on purpose squirrel-hitting sort of girl. Of course, I
won't swerve, or slow down, or otherwise endanger the occupants of my
vehicle, so that squirrel better be fast, or turn around, or he might
get hit. Usually they do that frantic combination of all of those
and somehow manage to avoid my wheels, though there have been many
times they went under my car, but emerged unscathed on the other
side.
Nowadays
though, they're not doing that. They're on some sort of mission.
Maybe they're running from squirrel-zombies only they can see. Maybe
they ARE squirrel-zombies and that's why they just run, knowing
they're already dead, so why would getting hit by a car matter?
But
so often? Nine out of ten times I pass two squirrels in two blocks.
It's worse out on the main streets. Squirrel road kill everywhere.
Seriously. A massive increase in dead carcasses littering the
landscape. Maybe they got hit. Maybe the zombie-squirrels killed
them, sucked out their edible parts, and left the pancake behind. I
don't know. But I was wondering about my sanity, about the
possibility of a true Squirrelmageddon, but hadn't said a word to
ANYONE. (For obvious reasons.)
Then
one day The Transporter was transporting me (because that's what he
does) and says to me, out of the blue:
“So
Mom, have you noticed the Squirrelmageddon?”
“What
do you mean?” (acting casual, digging for info)
“I
mean, there are like at least twice as many squirrels running around,
and they're not stopping, and there are dead ones everywhere. What's
up with that?”
“Well,
I have no idea, but YES, I've noticed but I thought I was, you know,
a little crazy.
“Well,
yeah, you are, but not about the squirrels.”
So
we've been counting. And debating causes. Meanwhile, I'm wondering
if you've noticed anything odd about the squirrels in your
neighborhood. Do tell.
~Tina
P.S
No actual squirrels were harmed in the making of this post.
P.P.S
There is the possibility that I've been watching too much Walking
Dead. But that doesn't change the fact that in my town, it's
Squirrelmageddon.
