Monday, March 10, 2014

5 Things You Should Know About Raising Boys




I'm the mother of two boys.  I don't have a female child.  Perhaps this colors my opinions somewhat, but I thought I'd share some observations.  My boys are 16 (going on 17 in two weeks) and 14.

Boys like to show their love for each other by constant wrestling and just generally annoying each other. Most of the time it goes on until someone gets hurt.  I try to just let them have at it now that they're more equally matched size wise, but it's hard to take when they're so close you might end up collateral damage...

Boys have sensitive feelings just like girls, they just express them in different ways.  I won't go into details, because they also like their privacy.  Hey, at least they're aware enough that I do blog, and I frequently hear, "Don't put this on your blog, MOM!"

Boys and their dads will find things funny that you find gross.  You will not understand why they're laughing their butts off until they're practically falling out of their seats.  They will probably blow beverages out of their noses when they first start talking about this supposedly funny thing.  

It's usually inappropriate for dinner table conversation, but I've decided to handle it by not trying to understand the humor (because every time they try to explain it, they just laugh harder and I still don't get it) and not even trying to get them to stop. Besides, it's rather nice to see you're usually so stressed out Engineer laughing that hard and having that much fun.

Boys are just as capable of any household chore as girls are.  There is no such thing as a "girl" chore or a "boy" chore. I know this isn't new information, but The Engineer grew up where there were these distinctions, and therefore, until recently, he hadn't done some of the chores the boys (all three of them) are now doing.  

Sometimes they're even better at it than their mother. OYT, for example, is a meticulous master with the vacuum cleaner. Once you get him started (it's the "getting started" part that is rather hard...) he will really do a good job - actually LOOK at what he's doing as opposed to just going through the motions. He'll use the attachments.  He will move the furniture!

Boys are just a joy to raise.  They are different from me.  They think, process, and approach problems differently.  These differences make conversation really entertaining.  A son's relationship with his mom is very different (wow, my vocabulary is really cooperating with me today...) than that with his dad. I'm glad my sons have both of us to make somewhat of a balance.  

Parenting is a tough gig no matter what your family situation is like, and I support all kinds of definitions of family.

All I can say for sure is God knew what he was doing when he gave me only boys.  I'm having a blast, and besides, they're really strong and carry stuff for me ;-)

Agree?  Disagree?  Have some of each and can compare?  Discuss!

~Tina

P.S My blogging mentor, Amanda of House Revivals, now has me trying to use Pinterest and teaching me about “pinnable images,” as I told you recently.

This beautiful image was a gift from her.  Would please, if you don't mind, try pinning it. I just want to know if it works. Thanks!







26 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I agree. Yeah, we have a warped sense of humor. We also like to blow stuff up (or at least watch stuff blow up) and that never goes away.

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Tina .. having two brothers I can certainly remember hilarious times - while just sometimes I'm left bereft at friends' jokes .. completely leaving me dumbfounded and at a loss.

But great to read the rapport you all have ... lovely that you can share with us ... and do sneak in a few 'don't blog about this Mum' stories!

Cheers and have a great week - Hilary

Brian Miller said...

ha. we are def different animals....but we are sensitive...my youngest got the sensitive side...and he gets his feelings hurt by his brother often....

Elsie Amata said...

I concur - boys have genuine feelings. Especially when it comes to family. They can tear up just as quick as anyone else around.

And, chores, let me tell you, my boys do a better job than my 14 year old girl. Or they did (they are out of the house, pretty much anyway.)

Boys are just less drama than girls. =P

JoJo said...

I don't have kids so I have no opinions to offer either way. I think I would have preferred to raise a boy though, simply because I am not feminine at all and if I'd ended up with a 'girly girl' instead of a tomboy like I was, I would have failed miserably. I know nothing about style, hair, make up, etc.

parentyourbusiness.com said...

Agree - my two boys provide a dimension to my life that I never anticipated. And frankly, it's improved my marriage to have boys. I now know that some of the things my husband does are inherent traits and not designed specifically to tick me off.

amanda lee said...

Boys are awesome! Sometimes all their boy activities leave me dumbfounded, but the nice thing about having boys in their mid-twenties is they usually bring girlfriends along to family get-togethers, so we can do things like braid hair while they move logs around and build giant fires and stuff like that.

amanda lee said...

Successfully pinned!

Elizabeth Seckman said...

As the mom of four boys (19,18,16, and 13) you are very right!!!

My oldest came home from college and they were all s excited you'd think it was WWF at our house. And I do think not having a daughter changes things. Not sure why that is, but I swear, there is a difference.

I think we are the luckiest of ladies. Guys are great. I wouldn't change my family make up for all the girls in the world.

Excellent post :)

bemuzin.com said...

Agree, check, check, and check. I think parents love and enjoy whatever gender their children are, but it's always good to feel like you have a handle on some of the differences - lucky for them and you! You clearly understand a lot about your sons. Enjoyed reading this :-)

bemuzin.com said...

Agree, check, check, and check. I think parents love and enjoy whatever gender their children are, but it's always good to feel like you have a handle on some of the differences - lucky for them and you! You clearly understand a lot about your sons. Enjoyed reading this :-)

Björn said...

Not having children of my own I can just agree... I still recall how it was between me and my little sister growing up... Imagine her doing any houshold work... Ha...!! I did the cooking, cleaning and the minimum things needed with a working mum...

Her idea of cooking was limited to pasta (and only pasta)..

Björn said...

Not having children of my own I can just agree... I still recall how it was between me and my little sister growing up... Imagine her doing any houshold work... Ha...!! I did the cooking, cleaning and the minimum things needed with a working mum...

Her idea of cooking was limited to pasta (and only pasta)..

Björn said...

Not having children of my own I can just agree... I still recall how it was between me and my little sister growing up... Imagine her doing any houshold work... Ha...!! I did the cooking, cleaning and the minimum things needed with a working mum...

Her idea of cooking was limited to pasta (and only pasta)..

CA Heaven said...

I've got two boys too (and no girls), and I very much agree. However, with 7 years age difference they don't fight or wrestle much (the outcome would be given). In general, they are calm and quiet at home an get their adrenaline kicks in the skiing resorts. Little boy started to ski the black slopes and jump the black jumps earlier than he should. That's just what he needs to do if he wanna follow his older brother. So far he hasn't got hurt >:)

Cold As Heaven

Andrew Leon said...

My boys don't wrestle, but one is five years older than the other.

And, as the parent of two boys and a girl, boys are WAY easier.

A Beer For The Shower said...

It's true, boys can be just as good at chores as girls. My mother discovered this at an early age and turned me into her personal maid. Nowadays, it's *me* that does all of the cooking, the cleaning, and the laundry in this household. My wife's just crap at it compared to me.

Now then, if we can please never mention this again, a guy has a certain "man-cred" that he has to live up to...

Jo said...

You and Andrew both writing about parenting today. Not a parent myself and don't feel I am missing anything.

What picture?

Rachel said...

I don't have any expirence as a mother, but as the oldest born cousin on both sides of my family, I completely agree. I used to help take care of the little ones (even though I was little too, I was just the oldest) and that prepared me for babysitting them.

Julie Cunningham said...

Pinned, my friend. The boys in my house are just more prone to absent-minded professor behavior... I'm never quite sure whether that is a chromosome thing or a selective hearing thing. Either way, all three of them are afflicted with it. :D

Julie @ Julie 2 Jules

Shannon Lawrence said...

I've got one of each, but I also had three younger brothers. Boys are a kick, that's for sure. My son has been such an easy child until the last 6 months or so. Apparently, 8 1/2 is rough, at least for us. Now he's 9 and still making me want to hang him by his toes in the attic. But he's also developing a sense of humor, which I thought wouldn't happen (his nickname was Mr. Serious when he was younger and Jeff and I are both smart arses, so we couldn't understand why he was so serious).

I was absolutely terrified of having a daughter. I'm still not the girly mom she would be best served with, but hey, she was born to me for a reason. And she's the girliest girl you could ever imagine. I have no idea how that happened. I do have a younger sister, as well, but she's a total tomboy, so I kind of expected my daughter to be, too. Nope!

Kids are amazing, all around. If I can just figure out how to deal with my son now I'll be happy. :)

Abdul J. said...

This post really helped me to laugh and made me happy because I'm a boy. It's really wonderful to read your experiences. All behaviours are as same as mine, my brother's and father's. We laugh our butts off, practically fall out of our seats, and blow beverages out of our noses.

Wonderful Ms. Tina. I's really wonderful.

-Abdul

http://ajbozdar.me

Cynthia said...

I have a son. He's just a toddler still, but it's fun to watch him react to the things he finds entertaining.

Thank you for sharing your list. It gives me something to look forward to as he gets older. =)

Claudia said...

i have two girls and a boy in the middle...he always was well pampered by his sisters...smiles... think that is a totally different situation...they fought sometimes as well though...smiles

The Costello Family said...

3 girls against 1 boy really changes the dynamics. He doesn't get the wrestling partner, but God certainly landed that boy with sisters for a reason. He needed the humbling! LOL! No macho games allowed or you get thrashed by girls. Usually verbally, but they'll physically pin him down if necessary. ;)

Yes, he does housework (buswork?) better in some areas too. It just gets hard to notice through the whining.

Lisa said...

I only have one girl (16 & a dancer) so it amazes me that people survive without glitter in their lives! Thanks for sharing so I can get a glimpse of how the other half lives!
LOL!!!