Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Macbooks are Lactose Intolerant


You know how they say counting your blessings is a really good way to stay positive, focus on the bright side, be happy, don’t worry…You’re at the wrong blog if that’s what you’re looking for.  Today I’m going to whine.  No!  Not about my health!  Even I’m sick of listening to that.  No, I’m writing a eulogy.  To my beloved Mackie.  May she frolic with all the other broken toys in a magical place where laptops go to play when their people are done with them…

We won’t go into details, because he already feels bad enough, but one of my darling children poured a 16 ounce glass of milk on her.  I of course sprang into immediate action, drying her off and trying to minimize damage, but we’re not talking spilling on keyboard here.  We’re talking about a 13” dainty laptop ending up in a pool of milk in the middle of a mattress (because glasses balance well on mattresses especially when you set it down (why?) and then JUMP onto the bed).   She’s got power, captain, but she no worky.  I’ve given it all I’ve got.

I do have her soul, though.  On my time-machine.  However, to restore to a previous date, on must have a body to put the soul into.  A working body…so meanwhile, I’m on a PC . Fighting with Vista and mourning my sleek, beautiful mac.  My constant companion, my everything.  I’m password vaultless, and it’s like I’m driving someone else’s car and not only is it a stick shift, it’s not even a Volvo…, and I can’t access my writing.  I have ten or so half-written posts.  Thankfully I’d already switched from Safari to Chrome so all my bookmarks are still available.  I still have my gmail.  Feel free to send letters of condolences there.

Have you ever lost a treasured piece of technology?  More importantly – have you ever recovered a mac from lactose intolerance?  If so, send in the troups.

P.S I was going for maximum cheesiness here, so I read it to the child who didn’t spill the milk, and he said, “Oh yeah, you definitely hit the cheese level.  Spray cheese."  Sigh.  What a lovely compliment.

P.P.S Credit where credit is due: it was my buddy Arlee Bird who coined the term of lactose intolerances’ usage in this application.  You’ve heard his name because of his hugely popular blog Tossing it Out, and because he’s the leader of the A-Z Challenge.  You might have heard about that here too…

13 comments:

Arlee Bird said...

I appreciate the nod of acknowledgment but I wish I weren't coining phases under such dire circumstances even though I know I'm often one to milk topics for comedy.

What I'm wondering is what's with the 16 oz glass of milk. I mean I know your boy is growing, but where did you find those big glasses? You all must have a huge dairy bill each week. Do you keep milk cows in your back yard?

And maybe equally disturbing to the Mac being doused in milk is the milk on the mattress. That must have been a mess. Who's got to sleep in that bed?

By the way, I think there is an A to Z post for the letter M waiting in this story somewhere. Quick write it down in your Mac--er, sorry.

And seriously I'm sorry about the catastrophe. I've thought about this happening to my computer although in my case it would either be coffee or brandy depending on the time of day. Glad you didn't lose too much in the way of data and hope you find a cheap fix for the computer.


Lee
Wrote By Rote

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Really sorry about the laptop. Glad you had everything saved though.

D.G. Hudson said...

Our kids thought putting their sandwiches on top of the printer was okay, until the printer gave up the ghost in retaliation for the crumbs.

Good luck getting things straightened out.

Tina said...

Tina @ Life is Good

link test

Brian Miller said...

oh this hurts my heart....i hate computer issues...i am glad you can salvage some of her but oy what a headache....

JoJo said...

Wow that's really too bad. What a bummer!!! :(

Heather Murphy said...

Ahhh, so sorry for your loss! :(
My ex-husband spilled sticky orange juice on the keyboard of my first computer and didn't fess up until the company sent a replacement. Thankfully it was still under warranty.

On a side note, I think I am going to have to back out of the A-Z Road Trip. I have been a bad girl and I don't see any time in the near future that I could possibly catch up. Sorry :(

House Revivals said...

Yes! Yes, I have lost treasured electronics. Try putting out a DIY blog, with a dead PC and a broken camera. Dozens of DIY project photos were on that hard drive (which I saved, but have no clue what to do with), and no camera to retake the pictures. Sad day. I'm currently borrowing my husband's old laptop, but it is screwy, and randomly erases pages of work. I have been using my camera phone to take blog pictures for the last several months. It's sad and pathetic.

mare ball said...

Our son spilled soda on our laptop a few years ago. He flipped it upside down and used a hair dryer on it, but to no avail. The only consolation was that the laptop was old, and it gave us an excuse to get a new one. But, still, before the spill, the old one worked OK. It's very discouraging to lose a much-depended-on item. It always make me wonder if I'm too attached!

Laurita said...

oh, my heart breaks for you and your poor departed Mac. Although I did laugh at your title, even when I knew what was coming. Forgive me?

Jo said...

The fan on my CPU was being noisy so my husband sprayed it with WD40. Straight into the main part of the computer. This was a few years ago, but......

So I can sympathise.

J. Kwiatkowski-Schuler said...

My condolences on your recent loss. I've never lost a computer, but my husband recently knocked some antique salt and pepper shakers that my grandmother gave me off of a shelf [that was above a window, no less!] and they broke to bits. Yet I suffer him to walk amongst the living.

J.L. Campbell said...

Sounds like a disaster of epic proportion. I've had enough pc meltdowns to be able to relate to the agony you must have gone through. When these things happen, I try hard not to think about all the stuff I've lost.