I have writer's block this morning. I've been sitting here visiting all my favorite blogs, hoping that inspiration would strike. It hasn't. I feel thick today, as in my lungs are too thick to suck in enough oxygen, leaving me breathless and winded at the slightest exertion. My hands and fingers are thick, for some unexplainable reason, swollen. Perhaps the two hours of gardening on Saturday? Yea, probably too much for my first time out there this season, and the first really physical thing I've done since this whole nasty whooping cough ordeal started. My feet and toes are even thick. My skin just feels too tight on me today. And of course my brain is thick – no inspiration or idea can get out (or in it seems.) But, I have to write. Want to write. So I asked YellowBoy, who is sitting here at my blue table with me, “What should I write about today?” He said, “Brags and Sags of Homeschooling” right before he wound himself all up in the angst of his long division assignments. This is our last week of school, and he has close to seven pages left. But I like his idea, so here we go.
I'll start with the sags, so that I can end on a good note.
Sag: though I'm a math nerd, appreciative of the beauty and symmetry and sheer poetry all things mathematical, my boys are not. They have been damaged, seemingly beyond repair, by their previous math experiences. No amount of fun assignments have changed their minds. Not the tangrams, not the origami. Not even getting to grade their own work with my iPhone calculator has changed their stubborn little minds. They hate math. And tell me everyday.
Sag: ten preps a day. It's killing me. I'm trying to go at the pace set by their school, but it's very hard to do the science and history for Jake. So much could be gained in class discussion, but it's not much of a discussion when there are only two of you. I'm so looking forward to next year when someone else is doing all of the planning, and all I have to do is supervise and grade. (We have chosen COVA, Colorado On-line Virtual Academy for next year.)
Sag: the whole sacred serenity thing. I'm never alone. EVER.
Sag: the grading. I'm hopelessly behind. Ten preps a day is also ten things to grade each day. It's not happening.
Think I'd better switch gears here...let's do the brags. I'm depressing myself with the sag list.
Brag: A loose schedule. It's lovely to not have to set an alarm, for the first time in I can't remember how long. I sleep until YellowBoy convinces me to get up. It goes something like this: a quiet touch on the shoulder, and then an announcement of the time. Followed by, “I'm so hungry, please get up!” Then, “Come back in fifteen minutes.” This can go on for a while, but it usually ends when I'm awake enough to realize how hungry I am. Then we cook breakfast together. He's learned a lot during his cooking lessons, but wants company and reassurance.
Brag: No tuition payments. We're actually surviving without my income, which was 1/3 of our total. Good thing, too, because we are Financial Peace graduates without credit cards. Dave Ramsey would be proud.
Brag: Time with my boys. Yes, this is also a sag. It's my list! I love getting to spend more time with them. We're so much more connected now that I'm not arriving at 5:30, exhausted from the day's work, and grumpy-hungry. We've had time to really talk, and enjoy each other's company, and work together. YellowBoy likes to share this table with me. He does his lessons, I do my writing and blog visiting. I'm right there if he has questions, or to hear his random thoughts. He's famous for out-of-the-blue ponderings. I should start writing them down. “Mom, isn't it weird how your stomach can stretch so much? What is it made of?”
Yes, the brags out weigh the sags. This is a good thing. And thanks for sticking with me. I'm going to look for inspiration for tomorrow.